Spatz S1E3 (1990) - FULL EPISODE
Toni's Tall Tale. What do you do when you've tried to impress your disapproving parents by telling them you're a restaurant manager, and then they come to sample lunch and have a look around? One member of staff is about to find out the hard way. Meanwhile, a special contest will see a sensational prize going to the first of the company's European employees to sell 500 Spatz burgers from opening time today, and Dexter will stop at nothing to win it. This episode was originally broadcast on Wednesday, 7th March, 1990. I really like this one, and the sub-sub-plot of the half-a-million newly-designed napkins adds an extra level. Silly lines such as "I'll take a picture of your phone ringing" always make me laugh, but it's Karen's "Don't take it personally" when she accidentally pays TJ a compliment wins the day for me. I love those easily-missed incidental bits. Speaking of TJ, it really helps establish what kind of character he is when he unquestioningly plays along with the charade, despite not being in on it. Also, check out the computer being 'online' years before the internet took off. It wasn't unusual for companies to do that sort of thing, but it looked positively space age to us with our school Acorns! Anyway, while Dexter plays a very large part, this is very much Toni's episode - which makes it all the more surprising that this is Samantha Janus's final appearance on the show. I really don't know whether there's a story behind that, or whether it was planned from the beginning, but the epilogue (which could easily have been tacked on at a later date - I don't know) simply says that she's resigned and, indeed, this is the last we ever see of her. Adding fuel to the fire is that Sam can clearly be seen in the end credits of the first three episodes (despite not even being in the very first), but these were subsequently re-shot for episode four onwards. The plot thickens. The pushy parents parents theme is realised well, predominantly by Jenny Lee, who played recurring characters in the likes of Monarch of the Glen and The Dirtwater Dynasty, and also boasts credits in the likes of Doctor Who and Grange Hill. I like the way she strikes the balance between being bossy and uptight, but she also really does care and is proud of her daughter, despite having a funny way of showing it. Oh, and at 22:29, her camera flash doesn't seem to fire, even though TJ reacts. The hen-pecked dad, meanwhile, is played by Jake D'Arcy, who I'm sorry to say is no longer with us. You may recognise him from Still Game, plus he has credits in the likes of Hamish Macbeth and Gregory's Girl. Amongst the other guest stars, keep an eye out for Jeremy Stockwell, who also appeared in an episode of T-Bag (from the same writers) and I believe was the Jeremy in Finders Keepers (as in "Jeremy's Joker"). Look out for some Children's ITV continuity at the beginning and end featuring Jeanne Downs, Scally, and special guest Natasha Knight. Young actress Natasha is there to promote her role as a victim of child abuse in an unbelievably hard-hitting Press Gang two-parter simply called Something Terrible, which concluded the next day. I haven't been able to find out much about her subsequent career, but she does mention that she went to Corona Stage School, which makes me wonder whether she was related to its founder, one Rona Knight. (It's also just occurred to me why it's called Corona: Co-Rona. (co)RONA. "Rona". I can be remarkably slow at times.) Also, I wonder whether she ever a Pink Windmill Kid - I'm pretty sure there *was* a Natasha, circa 1983... Many thanks to Joe for lending me this tape. (To the best of my knowledge, the contents of this video have never been available commercially anywhere in the world. Please also note that I don't monetise any of my uploads. Nevertheless, if you are a copyright holder and have an objection, please don't hesitate to contact me.)
Spatz S1E1 (1990) - FULL EPISODE
So who remembers Spatz? It was an early 90s CITV sitcom based in a fast food restaurant, a co-production (to begin with, anyway) between British and Canadian teams. It seems to me that, in fact, a lot of people remember a CITV comedy set in a burger bar; they remember all the characters; they remember the tap dancer in the opening credits... but for the life of them they can't remember its name. Well, it's Spatz, and it was written by Lee Pressman and Grant Cathro - the same duo behind the likes of T-Bag, Mike and Angelo, and Spatz's spiritual successor Cone Zone. Anyway, this is the very first episode, called Royal Visit, and I gather the original air date must have been 21st February 1990. Look out for some CITV continuity before and after from Jeanne Downs and Scally, and also for Vas Blackwood in his pre-Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels days. Erstwhile Pink Windmill Kid Joe Greco can be seen in one of the leading role as well. Meanwhile, if you're sure you recognise scary middle-management type Jennifer Calvert but can't quite place her, you're probably a Red Dwarf fan. She was the computer game character Lister got off with at the start of Gunmen of the Apocalypse. (It took me a while to click.) [EDIT: I previously used this section to call for an official DVD release of Spatz. Unfortunately, it was a long shot in the first place, and I'm reliably informed by someone on the inside that there's practically 0% chance of it happening now. Ho-hum.] Many thanks to Lindsay for lending me this tape. (Please remember that this is an off-air VHS recording, so don't go expecting 1080p HD quality. I'm fairly certain that this video isn't commercially available, and I've uploaded it for its historic interest only. That said, if you are a copyright holder and object, please don't hesitate to contact me.)
Spatz S1E2 (1990) - FULL EPISODE
Sound of Muzak. Orders from on high mean that TJ must play the new Spatz jingle through the restaurant PA system on a perpetual loop - no matter how irritating all and sundry find it. Meanwhile, heavy metal fan Vince falls for a musician of the rather more refined variety, but finds himself in hot water with Karen when a customer's wallet goes missing. This episode was originally broadcast on Wednesday, 28th February, 1990. There's a lot packed into this one, as in the grand scheme of things we're still trying to get to know the characters. With the opening episode more of a set-up, this is the first time we see the restaurant fully open for business and properly in the swing of things. It's very much a Vince episode, and being early in the run, there remains a certain amount of ambiguity as to whether he's a wrong 'un or not. The dangers of accusations and workplace gossip are played out well, along with the guilty-until-proven-innocent nature of the story. (Also ambiguous, while we're on the subject, are the ages of the main cast, who seem to be either teenagers or adults well into their 20s, depending on what the story dictates.) Anyway, the quirks and roles of each of the regulars are defined well, in particular ruthless dictator Karen and nice guy who does dad-like jokes TJ. (And I love the funny letter the episode unnecessarily opens with - another reminder of why I could never be a writer.) We also find out the type of music each individual is into, and I have to confess Dexter's is unexpected. What a joyous scene, though! As far as guest stars go, it's difficult to get more classy than Julia Sawalha and Sam Womack (credited as Samantha Janus, of course). Julia was a regular on Press Gang at the time, as referenced in the end continuity, and this is roughly a couple of years before really hitting the big time on Absolutely Fabulous. Samantha, meanwhile, only has a credit as "Young Maid" on Jekyll and Hyde before Spatz, but a year later was busy representing the UK in the Eurovision Song Contest. She's done loads on stage and screen down the years, and is probably best known as Ronnie in EastEnders. We should also applaud the late John Rapley, who provides excellent comic relief as the hapless customer who's lost his wallet. Most of John's IMDB is a list of bit-parts such as "Publican", "Janitor", "Vicar" and "Old Codger", but he's a very recognisable face and worth looking up. Look out for the Children's ITV continuity at beginning and end featuring Jeanne Downes, Scally, Clive Warren, and special guest Gian Sammarco - best remembered as Adrian Mole - plus a full ad break just to get you in the retro mood. Many thanks to Joe for lending me this tape. (To the best of my knowledge, the contents of this video have never been available commercially anywhere in the world. Please also note that I don't monetise any of my uploads. Nevertheless, if you are a copyright holder and have an objection, please don't hesitate to contact me.)
Spatz S1E4 (1990) - FULL EPISODE
Karen's Birthday. The new early-morning fitness workouts aren't proving popular amongst the staff, but Karen is determined to get them all into as physically good shape as herself - and doesn't shy away from telling them as much. When the crew find out something confidential about her history, though, what starts as a small joke soon puts Karen's nose out of joint. Meanwhile, TJ is on crutches and has his neck in a brace. This episode was originally broadcast on Wednesday, 14th March, 1990. (In the UK, anyway. Spatz was a Canadian co-production, and it's anyone's guess as to when these all first aired there.) Before we go any further, a few changes: Samantha Janus as Toni has gone, and is replaced for the rest of series one by Sue Devaney - she of Dinnerladies, Casualty, Coronation Street and Jonny Briggs fame - as Jo. This also necessitates some alterations in the opening and closing credit sequences, and while working on that, why not throw in the "Next week on Spatz..." teaser for the first time while you're at it? On to business, and there are some excellent gags in this one - not least the nose puns. There's also a very good ice hockey reveal, though I have to confess that some of the visual jokes may not be staged quite as well as they could have been; but it's all good fun nonetheless. For one of very few times on the show we get to see Karen's human side, complete with insecurities and vulnerability, before she really developed into the full-on hard-nosed corporate robot we all know and love. In fact, some of the other characters are still being found and not quite there yet, and Vince's crossing the line by that much doesn't seem quite fitting. New girl Jo is also extremely overfamiliar, which I suppose can't be helped, but does grate just a little this early in her Spatz career. Look out for a funny aerobics scene, complete with everyone in their own sporty gear (which Jeanne Downs sort of joins in on in the end continuity, incidentally). Dexter really looks the part, the retro Chelsea strip gave me a giggle, and Debby maybe shouldn't really be allowed on children's television. And is that a reference to a famous Madonna outfit? I'm not sure the timing quite fits. Also, I love the fact that they decided to give a boring old office computer 70s sci-fi sound effects. Guest star Peter MacQueen has performed in a lot more radio and theatre work than television down the years, but he has done some Shakespeare on our screens, and I was vaguely amused to see a credit in Bernard's Watch as "Policeman". You'll see why. Oh, and can anyone explain the gag about Jeanne and Scally standing still in the brief continuity at beginning? It's some sort of running joke, but I haven't got to the bottom of it yet. Many thanks to Joe for lending me this tape. (To the best of my knowledge, the contents of this video have never been available commercially anywhere in the world. Please also note that I don't monetise any of my uploads. Nevertheless, if you are a copyright holder and have an objection, please don't hesitate to contact me.)
Spatz S1E5 (1990) - FULL EPISODE
Local Hero. Karen's desperately trying to think up a new marketing ploy, and the perfect chance for a piece of free publicity arrives when a staff member performs the Heimlich manoeuvre on a choking customer. The idea of being headline news isn't necessarily a dream come true for everyone, though - not that anyone else would understand. This episode was originally broadcast on Wednesday, 21st March, 1990. Five shows in, and this one is Lily's chance to shine. In the course of the series, she's mostly the quiet and sensible character, and it makes perfect sense that she wouldn't crave the limelight thrust upon her the way her workmates seem to. Of course, there's also an underlying problem that needs addressing, and her scene with TJ as she discusses it is just about as poignant as a Children's ITV sitcom can get. Of course the interjections from Karen lighten the mood as necessary, and she's brilliant from the perfect timing of her very first entrance, through the line "Tell them in your own words - I wrote it all out for you," and right to her reaction to being royally shafted at the end. In other fun, look out for a fantastically inappropriate First Aid lesson that would probably see the restaurant closed down these days. In fact, on that note, what kind of fast food joint closes on a Saturday night anyway? How strange. Also odd is the fact that, even though we're only five episodes in, this is the second story line already regarding some sort of conflict between a worker and her overbearing parent. That said, one detail that reminded me yet again that I could never be a television writer is the guy saved by Lily. Now, the plot requires that someone needs to choke and have the Heimlich manoeuvre performed on them - and that's as far as I'd go. Anyone in the vicinity would have done. But this bloke has his own back-story and puts in a proper funny performance! I simply wouldn't have even considered going to those sorts of lengths. Keep an eye out for the Children's ITV continuity at the beginning and end featuring Jeanne Downs, Scally, Clive Warren, and none other than Michaela Strachan - there to promote her new single Take Good Care of My Heart: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Rlnuj1xmrU Many thanks to Joe for lending me this tape. (To the best of my knowledge, the contents of this video have never been available commercially anywhere in the world. Please also note that I don't monetise any of my uploads. Nevertheless, if you are a copyright holder and have an objection, please don't hesitate to contact me.)
Spatz S1E6 (1990) - FULL EPISODE
Death of a Spatzman. Glamorous soap star Cindy Stewart pops into the restaurant for lunch, and Dexter's efforts to impress her spiral wildly out of control. Meanwhile, a clerical error has led to TJ having a bit of a cash flow problem, and soon has to face the uncomfortable reality that dead people don't receive pay cheques. This episode was originally broadcast on Wednesday, 28th March, 1990. It's difficult to class this as either a Dexter or a TJ episode, so why not both? The theme of the bureaucracy being taken to ridiculous levels is a funny one, and I dare say even more relevant today what with it being all down to a computer glitch. It's funny that Stanley is the expert hacker in the gang, and his misunderstanding over TJ's apparent death, while not really a joke for kids' TV today (or possibly ever), at least ends with a "He put Basil in the ratatouille" type of comedy exit. The generosity of the staff in connection with TJ's being penniless stands in stark contrast to Karen's attitude, but that only makes it all the better, and adds an extra dimension to the furniture gag and ultimate resolution. As for Dexter, well, in case we didn't know already, we find out that he's literally all things to all people, as long as he stands to gain from the arrangement. His giveaway blink and the idea of trying to raise £200 overnight - a not inconsiderable sum today, positively ridiculous back then - obviously cause him no end of bother, but it's good to see him ponder the ethical dilemma of whether he should come clean or not, even if it's in an unbelievably shallow manner. The "Show her some teeth - then lie through them" line sums it all up perfectly, and the "You can't play the guitar" exchange gave me a good giggle. Meanwhile, the outfit Dexter finds himself wearing at the end acts as a brilliant visual underlining of the sheer lengths he'll go to. As a bit of an aside, there are a couple of technical points I'd like to raise, if I may. The first is that the speakerphone bit around 2:53 is surely supposed to have audio effect on it, isn't it? I mean, it needs to sound like it's coming through the phone, rather than the director (maybe) standing all off-mic near the camera. But, more all-encompassing, I have two questions regarding the colour of the picture throughout the series and the fact that it's so orange, and those questions are: what's with the picture colours throughout this series, and why does it all look so orange? I swear it's not my equipment. My theory is that they shot in NTSC and then we were left with a dodgy PAL conversion. Considering this was shot in the UK, surely everyone would have been better off if they'd gone in the opposite direction, but I suppose what's done is done. Here's what I'm talking about, by the way: https://image.ibb.co/ihfCea/spatzcolours.png I'd be (relatively) interested to hear a technical explanation, if anyone has one. Many thanks to Joe for lending me this tape. (To the best of my knowledge, the contents of this video have never been available commercially anywhere in the world. Please also note that I don't monetise any of my uploads. Nevertheless, if you are a copyright holder and have an objection, please don't hesitate to contact me.)
Spatz S1E7 (1990) - FULL EPISODE
The Wild Brunch. It's TJ's job to persuade a gang of hooligans to act with a little civility while in the restaurant, but it seems that talking things through isn't really how they like to settle disagreements. Meanwhile, Karen declares that under no circumstances should any customer receive more than the regulation amount of pickle in their burger. This episode was originally broadcast on Wednesday, 4th April, 1990. I like this one, but it's slightly odd. Some of the guest stars aren't entirely believable in their 'teenage hoodlum' roles, while some of the regulars drift so far out of character at points that one wonders whether this was written with a different show in mind before being shoehorned into the Spatz universe. In particular, it grates to see TJ lose his temper the way he does, and it's positively wrong on every level for him to throw a punch. I'm not sure about the extent of Vince's back story, either, and it comes across as a little ambiguous as to whether he means to cause the trouble he does; but in the end it's all tied up nicely and just about makes sense. All that said, even if I'm broadly critical of the overall episode, there are still moments that are extremely funny. Certain one-liners to describe the gang - "These guys don't split hairs, it's just heads" and "They don't eat with knives and forks... or hands," for instance - gave me a good laugh, as did Debby reeling off her increasingly distressing mishaps early on. Stanley's becoming ever more endearing, what with his enjoying the nicknames and not even realising he's being insulted, while Vas Blackwood demonstrates some brilliant physical comedy with his injured finger. Meanwhile, whoever wrote the almost satirical salt and napkins joke at the end obviously really had a bee in their bonnet about something. Nice Dickens reference, too. Most unexpected among the guest stars is Damian Williams, who presented Are You Smarter Than a 10-Year-Old? for a bit and didn't really come across as the macho gang type in that in all honesty. Also amongst the bunch of oldest-looking teenagers around are Neville and Gavin Watson, who I gather are brothers, partly because they went on to both appear in the same episode of The Comic Strip Presents..., and partly because of this: http://www.dazeddigital.com/photography/article/8929/1/gavin-watsons-neville Fancy that. This is what Gavin's up to: http://www.gavinwatsonarchive.com/ And this appears to be our Neville: https://www.discogs.com/artist/69143-Neville-Watson There are a few ads at the beginning (mostly because I was quite taken by that oh-so-futuristic Atari ST one, though many of the rest seem mis-scheduled), and check out some great Children's ITV continuity either side of Spatz featuring Jeanne Downs and Scally with special guests Julia Sawalha and Lee Ross, a.k.a. Linda and Kenny from Press Gang. This gives me the perfect opportunity to break out my favourite Ab Fab fact, which is that Jennifer Saunders is closer in age to Julia (10 years) than she is to Joanna Lumley (12 years). Here, though, have an especially close look at Lee and listen to Scally as Julia says the phrase "Fast and easy" in the introduction. Many thanks to Joe for lending me this tape. (To the best of my knowledge, the contents of this video have never been available commercially anywhere in the world. Please also note that I don't monetise any of my uploads. Nevertheless, if you are a copyright holder and have an objection, please don't hesitate to contact me.)
Spatz S1E8 (1990) - FULL EPISODE
Greenpieces. An environmental group protesting against the destruction of the rainforests are outside the restaurant urging everyone to boycott Spatz, and when a rogue leaflet finds its way into someone's burger box, the finger of suspicion begins being pointed amongst the staff. Are there sympathisers within? Meanwhile, TJ is excited to receive a particularly yummy package in the post from his native Canada. This episode was originally broadcast on Wednesday, 11th April, 1990. While ecological issues remain high on the agenda these days, the topicality of this storyline may be slightly lost in the mists of time. Back then, McDonald's were regularly being criticised for certain policies, and some very controversial leaflets were handed out by various groups, leading to the infamously interminable 'McLibel' trial. I'm pretty sure that case was brought within a few months of this episode airing, and it's interesting how both sides of the argument are presented here, and even though the Spatz crew are the 'goodies', they don't mind basically saying that they agree with PlanetWatch that things could and should be done a bit differently. Lily in particular comes across as very socially concerned, much to her detriment. Anyway, although the episode threatens to get swamped with issues, there are some very funny moments. There's the running joke about the leaky radiator, the "What's cooking, Stan?" reply, some nice background acting from Vas Blackwood around 22:32, Karen's reaction to thinking Debby's trying to tell her "something", and I like the way the 'yummy bars' sub-plot is all tied in at the end. Also good is the whodunnit element, with Jo's jumping to conclusions contrasted by TJ's unwavering loyalty to his staff, and another warning about the dangers of suspicion, accusations, and gossip in the workplace. Jeremy Gilley guest stars as Sebastian, and to be honest it doesn't seem like much acting was required on his part: http://www.peaceoneday.org/welcome Okay, so that's not about green matters, but he's obviously a tireless campaigner, and I think most would agree that world peace is no less a good cause. He would go on to make one further appearance in Spatz. (Incidentally, speaking of guest actors, who's the girl around 4:36 who insists she wants to go in? I'm sure I recognise her from something else, but maybe it's my imagination...) Keep an eye out at the beginning and end for some Children's ITV continuity with Jeanne Downs, Scally, and special guest Rusty Lee. Many thanks to Joe for lending me this tape. (To the best of my knowledge, the contents of this video have never been available commercially anywhere in the world. Please also note that I don't monetise any of my uploads. Nevertheless, if you are a copyright holder and have an objection, please don't hesitate to contact me.)
Spatz S1E9 (1990) - FULL EPISODE
Clowning Around. TJ's idea of holding children's parties in the restaurant goes down better with head office than it does with Karen. But would she really resort to sabotaging sweet little Henny's big day just to make a point? Meanwhile, Stanley can only tell his workmates so much about his girlfriend because it turns out he's never actually met her - but all that is about to change. This episode was originally broadcast on Wednesday, 18th April, 1990. There's a sudden huge ramp up in quality here in my opinion, and I think I'm going to have to declare this to be the funniest instalment of the first series. Karen turning into a cartoon villain, daft lines such as "Who told you to use your own initiative?" delivered in all sincerity, the boys all subtly leaving the girls to do the heavy lifting from 13:30, Stanley's completely unnecessary silly visual gag around 11:41, the perfect timing of closing the curtains... It all adds up to a great episode, and a foregleam of what was to come in the second series when any constraints of being a drama were jettisoned in favour of Spatz going full sitcom. As for the matter of the mystery girlfriend, I like how everyone sticks their oar in and offers completely contradictory relationship advice based on their own selfish viewpoints, yet no-one thinks to mention love or anything that really matters. The concept of cyber dating was practically unheard of back in 1990, but the subject is broached very well here in a way that doesn't make it seem completely alien. Of course, the final punchline is perfectly funny, clever, innocent, years ahead of its time, and pre-dates that famous 'no-one knows you're a dog' cartoon by a fair bit - only now, with the rise of the internet behind us and associated knowledge of the very worst that it can bring out in people, it unfortunately brings to mind far more sinister matters today than anyone could ever have imagined. A pity, but that's the world we live in. Speaking of which: Chris Langham. Credit where it's due, he puts in probably the funniest guest performances of the series here as Marvin the Magnificent, and was later excellent in The Thick of It, having been positively stellar in People Like Us. But, um, if you don't know the issue I'm awkwardly skirting around here, do yourself a favour and don't look him up. On the other hand, it's great to see sweet precious Jade Magri starring as an absolutely ghastly little horror, a few years before she landed the regular part of Ellie in series four of Mike and Angelo (another CITV comedy from the pens of Lee Pressman and Grant Cathro, of course). Overall, I can't praise this episode enough. Minor question: can anyone enlighten me as to what Dexter shouts between 16:10 to 16:15? Part of it sounds X-rated. Stay tuned at the beginning and end for some Children's ITV continuity presented by Jeanne Downs, who is joined by Rosie Marcel and Richard Hanson, young stars of Enid Blyton's The Castle of Adventure. You may recognise Rosie as Jac from Holby City (except she's smiling here) - she also played one of the little psychos in Press Gang around this time, and I think I may have spotted her in a queue in an earlier episode of Spatz, but I could be completely wrong about that. Many thanks to Joe for lending me this tape. (To the best of my knowledge, the contents of this video have never been available commercially anywhere in the world. Please also note that I don't monetise any of my uploads. Nevertheless, if you are a copyright holder and have an objection, please don't hesitate to contact me.)
Spatz S1E10 (1990) - FULL EPISODE
The Strike. Vince pops into rival burger bar Blimpy's for lunch and makes the unsettling discovery that they pay their staff a full 10p more per hour than Spatz. Is industrial action the answer? Not everyone thinks so, and for once TJ and Karen find themselves on the same side - sort of. This episode was originally broadcast on Wednesday, 25th April, 1990. When it comes to issues you don't really expect to be raised in a Children's ITV sitcom, the goodies going on a proper strike has to be quite high up the list. Not only that, but the whole negotiation thing is shown in great detail (though admittedly explained in a very funny way), and then the work-to-rule situation with its associated malicious compliance surely isn't the greatest example for kids, is it? I'm also not really sure why TJ is the target of the action as he was more keen than anyone to make concessions in the name of peace until that unnecessary escalation, but, nevertheless, it's a worthy addition to the series. (Even if it's another episode that could have done with an extra five minutes in the grade, given how *very* pink indeed it is at some points.) On balance, I think there's a lot more drama and character stuff than comedy in this one, and the addition of a slightly strange romantic undercurrent only underlines that. Jeremy Gilley is back as Sebastien, making the second of his two appearances on the show, and to be honest it's difficult to have a great deal of sympathy for him this time around. Local cinema manager Bernie - played by Ricky Diamond, who you may recognise from Playdays or Bodger and Badger - is the other main guest, while there seems to me to be a bit of a change in Debby, as she's suddenly gone all domesticated like never before. I don't think her boyfriend Derek had even been mentioned until the previous episode, and now all of a sudden they're in a long-term relationship and dreaming of marriage. All that said, I don't want to come across too critical, as there are good laughs to be had from Karen getting in a mess near the end (and struggling not to corpse), the way she rips up the clipboard in anger, Dexter's apparent ad lib around 11:15, and plenty more besides. I've left the ad break in at the beginning to help you get into the full retro mood, plus there's some Children's ITV continuity featuring Jeanne Downs and Scally - including part of a promo for that weekend's Ghost Train, which came from Australia, no less. I really hope more Saturday morning shows from the era will start to come to light sooner rather than later, but I fear many of them are gone forever. Many thanks to Joe for lending me this tape. (To the best of my knowledge, the contents of this video have never been available commercially anywhere in the world. Please also note that I don't monetise any of my uploads. Nevertheless, if you are a copyright holder and have an objection, please don't hesitate to contact me.)
Spatz S1E11 (1990) - FULL EPISODE
Sing for Your Supper. Sweet, mild-mannered Debby is not in a good mood: last night's romantic meal has left her convinced that she has absolutely nothing in common with her fiance. Will she and Derek make up and get back together again, or will a new love rival split them up forever? Meanwhile, Karen's latest bright idea is to instruct all the staff to sing to the customers while taking their orders. This episode was originally broadcast on Wednesday, 2nd May, 1990. For the second episode in a row, the idea of malicious compliance is used as the solution to the problem at hand, resulting in a very memorable musical ending. I like how Jo - who sticks her oar in very strongly in all aspects of this one - treats it all as a sort of showbiz opportunity while everyone else around her is struggling. Mind you, I don't know how we should take the implication that the concept of singing the orders is a great idea everywhere in the world, except for Britain! On a technical note, I wish the sound mix had been a bit bolder and the song itself a little quicker, and there are some dodgy edits around 16:35, but I think I'm beginning to get overly critical of these shows so I'll leave that there. As for the romantic strand, at times it makes the episode feel quite soap-like. I like that everyone has a different perspective on how the relationship issue should be resolved, and throwing in a third party gives it an added dimension. Said lover boy is played by Emile Charles, little brother of Craig Charles, who actually played a younger version of Lister in a time-travelling episode of Red Dwarf. It's notable that his character name here is Terry, and the writer is a certain Terry Saltsman. Is there any chance that there's some sort of autobiographical element to this story? Whatever the case, I'm sure I can't be the only one who thinks that there's an elephant-sized moral question mark hanging over Vince's actions with the flowers, but there you go. Look out at the beginning and end for some Children's ITV continuity featuring Jeanne Downs and Scally, the latter of whom raps the opening link to the amusement of the crew present. Many thanks to Joe for lending me this tape. (To the best of my knowledge, the contents of this video have never been available commercially anywhere in the world. Please also note that I don't monetise any of my uploads. Nevertheless, if you are a copyright holder and have an objection, please don't hesitate to contact me.)
Spatz S1E12 (1990) - FULL EPISODE
Smart Cookies. Rival fast food chain Blimpy's are making a nuisance of themselves, so TJ challenges them to take on Spatz's staff in a general knowledge quiz - with the losers having to declare the winners' burgers the best. With so much at stake, which team will be the one to hold their nerve? Meanwhile, Jo is supplementing her income with numerous second jobs, and absolutely none of them could possibly cause her to miss the big event under any circumstances whatsoever. This episode was originally broadcast on Wednesday, 9th May, 1990. There's something intrinsically funny about the concept of having an arch nemesis, and having the Blimpy's crew fill that role with each side thinking the others are the bad guys makes for a good dynamic. TJ's equivalent, Ivor - played by Paul Grunnert, who, believe it or not, was married to Bonnie Langford - is suitably conniving and underhand, meaning that Spatz maintain the moral high ground, so we know who the goodies *really* are. The only disappointment is that we didn't get to meet Karen's doppelganger! My favourite gag in this one is the "It's not what you think" joke near the beginning, but Vas Blackwood squeezing in the entirely justified line "What a guy, old Vas" runs it close. There's a reaction to Karen's mobile phone that seems odd in today's climate, but seeing her being chased away by a bunch of dogs more than makes up for that. On a couple of technical notes, we can clearly hear said dogs being whistled away at 4:45, which I'm sure we weren't supposed to, and around 6:40, we can blatantly see the edge of the set on the left of the screen, and maybe even a camera operator or someone in the darkness. I'm not sure I really get the "Watch it, crotchet, minim and quaver" line (unless I've misheard it), and there are also some emotional moments: Lily's family news most obviously, of course, but there's something sad about Stanley evidently knowing he's not the brightest. I'd rather he was left in state of blissful ignorance, but I suppose it makes for a more three-dimensional character. Look out for some Children's ITV continuity at the start and end featuring Jeanne Downs and Scally during National Pet Week. Many thanks to Joe for lending me this tape. (To the best of my knowledge, the contents of this video have never been available commercially anywhere in the world. Please also note that I don't monetise any of my uploads. Nevertheless, if you are a copyright holder and have an objection, please don't hesitate to contact me.)
Spatz S1E13 (1990) - FULL EPISODE
Bye Bye TJ. When TJ receives a letter saying he's being promoted, there are mixed emotions in the restaurant. Will he really go back to Canada to take up his new post, and who's going to be drafted in to replace him? Karen has some decisions to make, but things may not be entirely in her control. This episode was originally broadcast on Wednesday, 16th May, 1990. This is the last instalment of the first series, and having watched them all, it's occurred to me that there's a dynamic going on similar to Drop the Dead Donkey (which came slightly later, I hasten to point out). You know how most people in that newsroom get on well enough, but then Gus comes in and is an external agitator because he's more concerned about keeping Sir Royston happy than the workers? Well, compare and contrast that with Spatz. Here, all the staff are friendly and TJ is a nice guy who runs it perfectly well - but then there's Karen. In a strange way, she makes the show, because without her and her determination to toe the Frapelli line, there's nothing that wouldn't otherwise be resolved sensibly and amicably. I don't know whether there was a common problem with upper-middle-management back in the early 90s, or whether it's either a coincidence or my imagination entirely, but there you are. I say all this because Jennifer Calvert is truly brilliant in this one, with her various reactions and extremes of emotions when she's basically defeated that somehow never break character. In many ways, this is Karen's story. Besides all that, I love how Dexter is always looking after number one, and doesn't waste any time in dancing on TJ's grave and pushing to get his own yearned-for promotion. And it's quite daring for a children's show to have a bad guy that's not instantly dislikeable, but that description fits Dan Redican's performance as Melvin. I mean, he's obviously an incompetent, lazy oaf with a penchant for gambling who acts in an increasingly corrupt manner, but he's not the sort of personality you'd automatically hate, and I find that choice interesting. Something else I noticed is that TJ is to an extent goaded into taking up the job offer by Karen, and I can't decide whether that's in character or not. One thing that's for sure is that the whole resolution hinges on the coincidental finding of a particular document, while I love the fact that the mystery of the broken computer is solved without us ever knowing it was a mystery in the first place. Meanwhile, this is the last we see of the characters Lily and Jo in Spatz - and they both go out dressed like *that*! All in all, a good series, but better was to come once the Canadian co-production deal came to an end and Thames - or, more specifically, writers Lee Pressman and Grant Cathro - got full control the next year. Look out for some Children's ITV continuity at the beginning and end featuring Jeanne Downs as Scally's office secretary (or something), plus plenty of ads to give you that full retro flavour. Of particular interest is Stephen Fry explaining the whole Marathon/Snickers changeover. (Coincidentally, I think the next ad is voiced by Hugh Laurie.) Many thanks to Joe for lending me this tape. (To the best of my knowledge, the contents of this video have never been available commercially anywhere in the world. Please also note that I don't monetise any of my uploads. Nevertheless, if you are a copyright holder and have an objection, please don't hesitate to contact me.)
We Cannot Take You With Us
OggOne
